SEVENTH SEAL LIBRARY

God's Truth Not Smooth Words

Friendship Mirror

Friendship Mirror

©copyright 2005 Bonita M Quesinberry, R.C.

MS Musings, theme, Jan. 2006 issue

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One might wonder why some friends seem to stick around through thick and thin, yet others come and go; never to be seen or heard from again or, perhaps, only on rare occasions. It might appear to happen more so during some adversity self is going through at the time: illness, disease, divorce, or a lost job.

Such behaviour tells us something about the friend who walks away, but it also tells us something about self and should cause us to self-analyze; making sure we have not indulged in pity parties and/or overdosed on pity pills. Being ill is no excuse for being pessimistic, whiney, complaining, crying out with “Oh, woe is me,” abusive to those lending aid, or being negative in any way. Such behaviours definitely drive people away.

In truth, our friends mirror who we are on the inside and what kind of friend we are to others. Thus, we cannot attract true friends unless, first, we give bona fide friendship. In short, this relates to the old adage that we cannot give what we first do not have within; as well as the ancient proverb, “Treat others as you would want them to treat you.”

What is a true friend? Well, they love God first and foremost therefore love self. In loving self, they naturally love others without expectation: simply giving of self in myriad ways and on the scene when needed— without complaint. They tend to suffer in silence, making light of their own ailments yet knowing when to apply the brakes for rest.

Optimistic people prefer laughter to tears. This kind of friend also is very honest and always will say what we need to hear as opposed to what we think we want to hear. At the same time, such buddies offer sane solutions to problems, lift us up when we are down, encourage us when discouraged, cry with us when we grieve or hurt, laugh with us when we are joyous, and rapidly jump to care for us when ill: truly sharing every aspect of our lives in accordance with Christ’s instructions to His church, His people as it were.

There is no getting around the fact we draw to us people of the same ilk: if we are negative, the majority entering our circle will be negative; if positive, we attract predominantly positive people. Negative is to be absent from God; whereas positive people walk with God and in His loving ways. After all, God is pure love and optimism; although, He does hate with a perfect, this is to say, a justified hate for all that is evil.

This is not to say negative people never will enter a positive person’s circle; for they will, from time to time, with a desire to have and/or be like the positive or to see if they can gain control over positive. If negative is not willing to learn from and adopt positive’s behaviour, negative will move on while blaming positive for some imagined insult.

On the other hand, if positive steps into negative’s circle and does all the things an optimistic friend does yet pessimism persists in his or her negativity, then positive ultimately will move on rather than be pulled down into negative’s dark abyss: exactly as God instructs His sheep to do.

A true friend does not turn away from a friend for reasons over which one has no control, such as injuries or illness or diseases like Multiple Sclerosis and cancer or divorce or losing a job or even moving far from one another. They turn away from only that which is destructive, but not before offering help and solutions as well as forgiveness.

This writer has been blessed with friends ranging from 2 years to 20 years to as long as 52 years, albeit for the last 20 years she has lived 2300 miles from the longest of them; yet, each of these precious friends have been there for her during various hours of adversity over all these years; in the throes of divorce, death of children and other family members, illnesses, surgeries, diseases of MS, Lupus and, more recently, some flew 2300 miles to care for her following brain aneurysm surgery; despite the fact her daughter was there to help her mother.

By the grace and mercy of God, I am so blessed when I look into the mirror of my lifelong and even new friends, for I comprehend that they reflect the friend I am to them. Most important, however, is that they also reflect my walk with God and His Christ. I have incredibly loving friends who intensely love our Father and His Christ first!

What do you see when you gaze into your friendship mirror? Is the reflection full of darkness and pain or filled with laughter and love and Light?

The reality of this particular mirror is that each individual has the power to alter what it reflects by changing only one thing: SELF. This is just one of many choices we make every day while attending earth’s university known as Life; this particular course, amidst its vast curriculum, is Self-improvement. There are no magic drugs or drinks or people. Oh, mankind does tout a few things as magic cures, but sooner or later each kills due to accumulating side effects. God’s way is life eternal with no down sides.

One hard fact: we cannot change anyone except self; the winning combination being only God, by looking into His mirror first— that is, His Written Word reflecting who and what we truly are within— plus intense work on self’s part coupled with solid determination: refusing to waver, refusing to give in to weaknesses. We all have them, for pity sake!

If we had no weaknesses, Satan would have nothing to attack and Jesus would have not one single reason to grow stronger on our behalf while causing Lucifer to grow weaker against us. If Beelzebub grows stronger against our weaknesses, it is only because we gave him the control over us instead of holding on tightly to our dominion over him! Choice. It’s all about making wise choices. “Be ye not deceived.”

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18 September 2006 - Posted by | Bible, Blessings, Christ, Christian, Faith, Friends, Friendship, God, Jesus, Love, Spiritual, Truth

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